Friday, December 28, 2007

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LOUISIANA GOULASH


“This recipe was invented using trial and error. The name is actually a joke. My dad couldn’t think of ’jambalaya,’ so he said, ’Pass the Louisiana goulash.’ This made us laugh, and it’s in honor of him.” -CL Reader



3¼ C chopped tomato
¾ C (¼-inch-thick) slices celery
½ C water
⅓ C chopped onion
½ tsp paprika
½ tsp dried thyme
½ tsp dried rubbed sage
¼ tsp ground red pepper
¼ tsp Cajun seasoning
10 oz andouille sausage, cut into ¼-inch-thick slices
1 (14-ounce) can fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth
1 garlic clove, minced
1¼ C uncooked long-grain brown rice
½ lbs medium shrimp, peeled and deveined



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BEEF STROGANOFF



This classic Russian dish is easy to make; use frozen chopped onions and presliced mushrooms to speed preparation. To maintain a creamy consistency, be careful not to bring the sauce to a boil once you stir in the sour cream mixture. Serve with rice if you need a substitute for egg noodles.



1 (8-ounce) carton reduced-fat sour cream
3 tbsp no salt-added tomato paste
1 tsp Worcestershire sauce
½ C all-purpose flour
1 tsp salt
⅛ tsp freshly ground black pepper
2 lbs boneless sirloin steak, cut into (2-inch) strips
1 tbsp butter
½ C chopped onion
1 (14-ounce) can less-sodium beef broth
2 C sliced mushrooms
Chopped fresh parsley (optional)
8 C cooked medium egg noodles (about 7 cups uncooked pasta)



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WRITER OF THE APOCALYPSE

I am the writer of the apocalypse, the deliverer of armageddon. I will lay a wide swath of destruction through the blind, the straight, and the narrow to make a path for the coming of the Lord. In the bluster of the turbulence, hedonists will croak, shear jadedness, wear ashcloth and cry out His Holy Name.

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Beautiful Girls Die How

Where do beautiful girls go when they die? They go up high to form the stars that twinkle in the sky. In living their beauty makes our lives less dreary. In dying they light our way to make our passing less weary. She's there, wave to her, say hi!

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

ETERNITY

Life and Death are steps in the evolvement of the spirit. We move to the Creator and shed our bodily features as well as the trials and sufferings appurtenant to existence on earth. We are fulfilled to live in eternity as we reunite with the Creator, the Holy Almighty God the Father in rising from the dead. This He showed from the example of His Own Son, Jesus Christ, our Lord.

Friday, December 21, 2007

THE SAGA CONTINUES _ _ _

The undressing of my true nature awakened the monster in my heart. With unbridled fury, I swore to put hell to the torch and leave no stone unturned. I shall destroy it and free all the captives. I will unchain all those who are forever condemned and hopeless.

Then at the head of my armies I will march on the Gates of Heaven. By the swiftest herald I shall send an ultimatum to my Most Beloved, The Fairest Mary. Love and Forgiveness for me and for all.

All this by the stretch of my imagination.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

THE MARCH ONWARDS

"Spare me, have mercy on me O liege", the abominable creature cried out. I turned deaf to its pitiful imploring. I vented my ire on the evil it wrought and struck at its head with all my might It came free and rolled on the ground. When it stopped, there was my face.

"Have mercy on my soul O Lord", I cried out. Lust and greed bled from my own head at Mary's Feet.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

DEAR MYRA PART 2

Dear Myra:

It's people like you with valuable messages who get forwarded and inevitably help our country move an inch forward everyday.As more Filipinos become like you then the shift in the paradigm would be complete.

Yup, my brother, Dennis, passed it on to me. He probably thought I get bugged by misbehaving MMDA traffic enforcers. He is of that frame of mind because his driver encounters daily mulcting attempts by erring MMDA personnel. I don't want to repeat myself about their inclinations. Spare me also from having to comment about the readiness of the victims to bribe their way out of such fixes. Suffice it to say that I have been driving too long not to know where those motorist traps are where the vultures wait for their prey.

You know I've seen a lot of MMDA traffic people who don't leave their posts even under heavy rain. They wear worn out uniforms and look like they have not eaten a proper breakfast. There are those who can be as highly principled as you. They wage the battle for ideals out in the streets under the harsh elements while you do it from the aircon comfort of your late model sedan. Together we will move this country forward inch by inch, day in and day out, even if we have to drag it by the seat of its pants.

And may heaven help us all.

Jose

ARMIES ON THE MARCH

I shall slay the dragon for the love of God's Woman, The Virgin, Maria. I will wound it in battle, pursue it to the darkest dungeon, lay waste the gates of hell, free all the captives, show no mercy and cut off its head.

I will offer it at Her Feet and then with my armies march to the Gates of Heaven.

All by the stroke of my pen and the stretch of my imagination.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

THE PERFECT GIFT

Lord I'm perfectly happy with your greatest gift in my life, my granddaughter Sophie. She has given me the happiest moments of my whole life. I cannot ask for more. You have given me more than my fill of joy. You don't have to gift me with anything more. You have one perfectly satisfied customer here.

Consider my life a done deal. I'm ready to move on to the next step. Just call me when it's time to go. Yes siree, like the song goes, "all my bags are packed, I'm ready to go."

FAITHFULNESS

Why must you be faithful to one wife? Didn't God choose only one beautiful woman among all He created to bear His Only Son? Why would you even presume to be better than a God who concocted a snot nosed pissant like yourself from nothing but cosmic dust embedded on the earth?

AGING AND THE BEAUTIFUL

More and more I find I got time on my hands. The children are fully grown and earning well. Somehow the breadwinner yoke around my shoulders have been lifted quite a bit.

My wife ho-hums me as an old geezer and accords me no more awe than the worn food blender sitting idle in the kitchen. Well, I really don't mind the years creeping up on me. I'm fully resigned to living out my senior years. I'm no holdout or retard.

I will delight in latching on to my second boyhood. And near the end of the line, my second childhood.

I will dedicate the last remaining years my life to a full blown advocacy. Yup, beautiful women, and more beautiful women. What would life be like without them? God put them on earth to make living more bearable. Certainly dying too; they can also make it more bearable.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Dear Myra

Dear Myra:

Driving in Philippine conditions is unique. You can't take away the cultural from it. There is no better formula than good anticipation. Certainly there is no substitute for good timing and road smarts. If you know that Filipino bus drivers stray beyond the yellow lane, forget the paradigm shift. Just adjust your driving to that given fact. Don't add to the pollution by bellowing with your car horn.

And MMDA traffic enforcers are the micro view of a whole country. They are prone to crave extra income from illegal means and they are not trained well enough. Maybe we will get there someday. That sublime place of first world efficiency. In the meantime, control your blood pressure by recognizing the nuances of Filipino behavior behind the wheel and on the road. Then drive merrily along with a smile.

But thanks for your concern for all of us.

Jose

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

The Dragonslayer

I SHALL SLAY THE DRAGON FOR THE LOVE OF THE WOMAN, MARIA.

I WILL BEST THE DRAGON IN THE FIELD OF BATTLE AND SURPRISE IT WITH MY TENACITY AND GUILE.

BY THE STROKE OF MY PEN, I WILL OFFER ITS SEVERED HEAD AND LAY IT AT HER FEET.

BY A PRAYER

What is the hardest job in the world? Try praying all day like the monks and nuns do. What you'll surely get is a splitting headache, followed by migraine, and capped by ringing in the inner ear called tinnitus. Trust the alternative and homeopathic formulas of Selmedica to aid you under such trying circumstances.

Can you imagine what it feels to be on the receiving end of that endless prattle? Why,you would be inclined to grant their supplications just to make them stop. That's the power of prayer. So pray.

Pray with all your might and endlessly. After all it's free. Almighty God is the only Entity Who doesn't ask for money. For all your persistence, He might just relent and see things your way and grant you that Ferrari.

Spam the Lord. Pray and don't give Him a moment's rest. Fill His Inbox with your salesletters.

Monday, December 10, 2007

TEMPLES AT DAWN

Pray to the high heavens by building bridge ways at dawn!

TRUE LOVE

True love remains on an uphill climb even after the climax!

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Amerikansky

There could be a million things you could say about what's wrong with America. You could engage in the favorite pastime of browbeating Americans and blaming them for the ills of the world. I for one lived in the U.S. for almost seven (7) years and there's no denying the fact that they are one of the nicest people on earth.

Try living in with the Chinese. They just might eschew your cool cat ways or chew on you completely as an edible wild genus.It doesn't take a genius to notice how contrary they can get.

The Japanese are painstakingly courteous to a fault. They bow their heads to ward you off in place of the usual arms length poling. It's because they consider you an untouchable.

Hell, try the Arabs. How, where, why, what, and when you could get inserted is any body's wild guess.

Splitting With Headaches

What is the hardest job in the world? Try praying all day, without fail day in and day out. The monks and the nuns do it all the time. What you get is a splitting headache. Pretty soon ringing in the inner ear called tinnitus follows suit capped by a pervading migraine.

You will need Selmedica to rescue you. Just make sure you stay away from the Candisil, it's for that part opposite your head.

Can you imagine what it feels like to be on the receiving end of that endless prattle? Just to make them stop you would be inclined to grant what they pray for.That for you is the power of prayer. So pray. Pray persistently like there is no tomorrow. Maybe what you pray for might just be granted. Maybe you are like one mean migraining locomotive and the only way to stop your babble is to grant your wish.

Monday, December 3, 2007

Fame and Fortune

Seeking fame and fortune is too much hard work. I could have been a renowned writer, great chef, or the damn est lawyer but I am too lazy. Give me the simple joys. And when I die don't bother remembering me. That's for great men to worry about. Just bury me under a neat pile of hollow blocks where I won't trip somebody.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Evolution In Dimension

There is wealth in poverty, vigor in sickness, and life after death. God created man in His own Image above all living creatures on earth, and expects us to one day rise up to be like Him and figure it all out. He sent His only Son to stage a demo on Calvary. 2,000 years later we still don't understand.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

THE CURE FOR SMOKING?

IS THIS THE CURE FOR SMOKING?

A Dead Hero Walking Reveals_ _ _

A Secret Cure For Smoking That Works Permanently, Without Expensive Chemical Drugs , The Short Fuse Of Pep Seminars That Fall Into Psychological Ruts, And No 'Cold Turkey' Withdrawal Pangs ............In 7 Days Flat

You will never believe it that I did it myself. I actually stopped smoking 10 years ago with the exact same method in my permanent solution to the smoking habit.

Find a valid reason to stop smoking. It could be for your family's well being. It could be to for the delicate health of a newborn infant son. It could be for your own good health or to stop making the tobacco moguls richer.

Even if – You tried to quit a dozen times before but fell back
to the habit with the tension on the job or at home


Even if – You tried nicotine patches, gums, and other aids which
did nothing but upset your emotional balance

Even if – You live in dread of the next 'stop smoking' quack program hyped on TV or emailed to you as pesky spam.


Dear Friend,

Smoking is a health hazard not only to you who inhale it but also to the people around you. The nicotine tar sticks to your lungs, mouth, larynx, and teeth.

This leaves a blackish spotting and a yellowish tint. Your smile is definitely marred when your teeth become blemished.

The bystanders close to you or around you become passive smokers and sufferers. They don't get tarred inside like you but suffer the same bad effects on health that smoking brings.

The cigarette smoke drifts to the air they breathe and makes them candidates for the same danger of cancer.

Nicotine is highly addictive like opium and cocaine. The only difference is that you get it in small doses and in gradual amounts while lighting up cigarettes.

The psychological and hormonal disturbances in the body common to addiction show up the same way with nicotine.

The high feeling or releasing of tension coming from smoking is due to the impact of nicotine on the central nervous system, the pleasure part of the brain, and on the secretion of hormones.

As soon as it wears off, it is replaced by a craving. The smoker reaches for another cigarette until the gaps in between smokes get narrower. This is the beginning of what is called chain smoking

Group sessions like alcoholics anonymous try to lick dependency by giving a shoulder to lean on. The buddy system could work like an emotional crutch for smoking dependency as well. The problem with such group actions is that they don't go to the psychological root of the problem in a bid to stifle and build on them.

Spiritual exercises, mental healing, psychological introspections, psychiatric sessions, and motivational seminars attempt to dig deep into the smoker's psyche to probe the underlying causes of smoke addiction.

They fall short in the tracking and follow up of the resolve to quit smoking. Their leaning to the psychological fails to deal with nicotine as a chemical substance that lights the fuse of addiction that soon after gets snagged in the sticky web of nervous disorders .


The permanent cure for smoking addiction which I devised is so simple and so practical to do it by yourself at home. It is not expensive and does not involve costly psychiatric consultation or exotic drug novelty items.

I merely recalled the steps I took to cure my own smoking addiction permanently 10 years ago. I organized it and compiled it to make it available to a wide sector at a very affordable almost ridiculous price less than a new pair of pants.

You are free to circulate your copy once you receive it. I really don't care about royalties that much. Remember I turned fugitive from the gigantic Tobacco lobby for noble reasons higher than fame and fortune.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Comment If The Following Harangue Is Believable

Dear Anti - Smoking Champion :

Do you think that the following diatribe is credible or even possible. Tell us about your reaction to such preposterous commentary.


Attention : Habitual Smokers

Out In The Cold And On The Run, Insider- Lobbyist Cum Power Broker Reveals_ _ _

A Secret Cure For Smoking That Works Permanently, Without Expensive Chemical Drugs , The Short Fuse Of Pep Seminars That Fall Into Psychological Ruts, And No 'Cold Turkey' Withdrawal Pangs ............In 7 Days Flat

A Dead Hero Walking Breaks Away From The Shadowy Group Lurking Secretly Outside The Oval Office Without The Knowledge Of The President,

And Spills The Beans On The World Tobacco Conspiracy To Halt The Slide Of The Cigarette Industry And Boost It's Comeback

They Paint Smokers To Be Underdogs To Gain Public Sympathy To Reverse Falling Markets For Useless 'Stop Smoking' Drugs And Aids That Don't Really Work!

Cancers Will Rise In Tandem To Be Fed With The Vast Array of Cancer Drugs, Chemo Treatments, Addicting Painkillers, And Liquid Nutrition Packs, All Products Firing The Greed Of The Pharmaceutical Industry For Windfall Profits!

Their Hidden Agenda Is To Promote More Cigarette Sales At Huge Profits To Make You Sick So That The Pharmaceutic Industry Can Join The Feeding Frenzy!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Tobacco Conspiracy

Conspiracy of Smoking Industry, Politicians, and Pharmaceutical Industry Pass Bans And Harsh Laws Against Smokers To Stir Them Against Such Human Rights Abuse And Whip A Backlash In Favor of More Smoking!

They Paint The Smokers To Be The Underdogs To Win Wide Support To Build A Giant Market To Be Flooded With Useless Stop Smoking Drugs And Aids That Don't Really Work!